Skip to main content

Help

Image
By
Hey guys. This is a very personal post but... I need help.

Being a new mom has been, well, lonely. Really lonely.

Yes, I have my precious baby boy to play with all day but it's not like he can talk to me, really listen to me, or play with me. It's hard when it's so one sided alllll day.

The most exciting things in my life (other than the cute things Ander is constantly doing and the couple hours of rehearsal I have each week) are finally finding something good to watch on Netflix, finally seeing Brandon's car come in the driveway, or getting an Amazon package in the mail.

It's always been easy for me to make friends and form connections with people. I've always had a best friend. It's weird to not have one. Yes, I have close friends and I love them dearly. But I don't have that one person that I can call for anything, that person who lives down the road who I can hang out with all the time while Brandon is at work, or on the weekends to go have fun girly dates. I don't have that person who will listen to me, whose hair I can play with while we watch movies, someone to give me advice or share stories with. And it sucks.

Just because I have a kid doesn't mean I can't have a best friend, right? How do I make that happen? It's hard because I really like my ward but I haven't made a connection with anyone here. I had a calling in nursery for a long time and then I had a baby and was gone for a few months. As wonderful as Ander is, he makes it tough to socialize at church. I've wanted to become friends with certain ladies but then they moved, or are planning to move. Our ward is VERY transient. That's what you get when your ward is all town-homes, condos, and apartments. I have friends in Provo but it's 25 minutes away and Ander needs to stay close to home during the day so he can take naps. It's a dilemma.

I jokingly told Brandon I was gonna post something like "Attention! Now accepting applications for the long vacant position of... my best friend. Anyone can apply but Lehi residents preferred. Will train." on craigslist. Ha ha. But seriously.

I don't know what to do with myself a lot of the time. After I work out and my chores are done, I just kind of sit there. While Ander sleeps I read books, facebook way more than I should, journal, look for new recipes and watch meaningless baking shows on Netflix. It's depressing.

I need mommy friendly ideas of how I can serve others, how I can make the world a better place so that I feel fulfilled and needed. And, I need ideas on how to find, as Anne Shirley would say, a kindred spirit.

Help?

Thanks for listening.

~Jessie Kay

Comments

  1. RobinJanuary 31, 2014 at 3:44 PM

    Jessie, my darling, anyone would be blessed to have you for a best friend. Friends don't come more loyal and loving than you. I wish I lived closer, because I would love to be your best friend, even though I'm old. ;) I will pray that Father blesses you with a really good one!

    ReplyDelete
  2. jenedypaigeJanuary 31, 2014 at 7:26 PM

    I want to be your best friend!!! Call me and we'll FaceTime whenever you're bored! I totally know how you feel, I felt the same way with Morgan. Wish we lived closer.

    ReplyDelete
  3. The Downey'sFebruary 28, 2014 at 5:47 PM

    I so remember and still know this feeling! Being a Mom is awesome, but finding a really good friend is tough and you need one lots! I love how honest you are and I think what you wrote rings true for most women. Robin is so right, if you pray you'll find a bestie. Heavenly Father will send you a kindred spirit. I've done it before and it totally worked. Now that I'm writing it I'm realizing it's what I need to do too. Thanks for blogging. I love to peak at what you post.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

One in Four

By
It's crazy how quickly things can change. On Thursday, March 15th, we saw and heard our baby's strong heartbeat.  The following Monday, we discovered it had stopped beating. For reasons we will never know, our precious little one had died. We shared the news with broken hearts and received an outpouring of love from friends and family. What surprised me was hearing from so many of my friends who had experienced the same tragedy. I'd heard that miscarriages were common but I never thought it would happen to me. 25% of pregnancies end in miscarriage. One in four. There are so many of us. Too many. I never knew how common it was because no one ever talks about it. Why not?? I wanted to write about my experience to 1) help you understand if you've never gone through it and 2) to comfort those who may be in the middle of it. If you are, I am so so sorry. I started spotting when I was around 7 weeks along. I wasn't too worried because that is pretty commo...
1 comment
Read more

Birth Story | ROWAN JAMES

By
I started feeling some contractions that were stronger than normal while I was sitting at church on Sunday afternoon, March 3rd. After church I was feeling pretty tired so I tried to take a nap but the contractions kept waking me up. They weren’t that uncomfortable or consistent so I wasn’t sure if they were the real deal. Before we left for family dinner at Brandon’s parent’s in Provo, I wondered if we should bring clothes for the boys in case we had to leave them there and go have a baby. It was 13 days before my due date so I figured we were probably safe and we headed to dinner. I started timing the contractions at 5pm in the car because, while they still weren’t super strong, they were becoming more consistent. They were only about 5 minutes apart when we got to Provo. We had a delicious dinner with Brandon’s family (pasta carbonara, meatballs, salad, garlic bread. YUM. Best pre delivery meal ever! ha ha), me pausing every couple minutes to breathe through a contraction. Ar...
Post a Comment
Read more